Tumultuous week, Ups and Downs

Well this past week is definitely one I could have done without!! Remember The Day My Karma Left Me when I had my annual Squish and Flatten? The saga did not end there.

I came home from work last Wednesday and I had a letter from the mammogram people. They found something suspicious and needed me to come in for another picture and if needed an ultrasound of the boob in question. I do believe my heart stopped for an instant as I read the letter. Of course I instantly thought the worst, remember I lost a very dear friend to breast cancer recently. I missed her greatly that day, I wanted to call her. I picked up the phone and then remembered that she was gone.....what a horrible feeling.

I called the mammogram people immediately and scheduled my second photo session for the following day. They did close up shots this time. The technician showed me my first pictures and I must admit, I did not know my boobs were so photogenic!! The radiologist had circled 5 areas of concern.....5 areas!!! I think my heart missed a beat again.

After taking and developing my close up shots, she told me that I needed to make an ultrasound appointment. I could not believe this was happening. I called the ultrasound people immediately and the soonest they could schedule was me was for June 5. That was 2 weeks away...I can imagine a complete disaster in 2 weeks, I could write my will and plan my funeral. Why is it that we always imagine the worst, and plan for it?? I did not think the best and plan a party to celebrate...odd how the human mind works.

When I got home that day, shell shocked to be sure, I had a phone message from my doctor's office. They needed to schedule an appointment to review the mammogram and ultrasound results. Unfortunately my doctor will be on vacation the first 2 weeks of June (of course) and they could not schedule me until June 21. A month away...I might die by then!!! I said to the receptionist - "That is an awful long time to have wait to find out if you have cancer". She was very quiet on phone, but I think I put it in perspective. Sometimes we forget that a human is attached to every appointment slot, not just a name. Of course it wasn't her fault, and she could not do anything about the situation...she is actually quite nice and very accommodating. I was just very frustrated, and scared.

How can I wait this long? I have no choice. I must be patient, but I can also be persistent. I called the ultrasound people every morning and asked if they had any opening for that day...and bingo...today I hit the jackpot....they squeezed me in!!!

The ultrasound technician told me that my close up shots did not show anything abnormal...Huh?? That did not make any sense to me...the only thing I could think of is that they missed the area in question, I am pretty well endowed!! We did the ultrasound and she immediately spotted a suspicious area and took lots of photos of it. She then told me she was going to consult with the Radiologist and that he might come in and look at the screen. She returns in 5 minutes and informs me that he said it "appears to be cystic in nature" and to return in 6 months for another ultrasound. She also told me to do my exams and check for changes. Now, mind you, I cannot feel what she found. It must be very deep, but I guess if I do start feeling it I will start freaking out a bit!!

So that is that!! I had breast cancer (in my mind) and now I don't....if only it was that easy in reality!!! I could have done without this roller coaster ride!!