Life Lived, No Regrets

Trials and Tribulations of Life. These have been on my mind lately. I have gone through many in my life. I wouldn't change a thing. If I had the power to go back in time and change aspects of my life, I wouldn't change anything. Why? I have gone through some very painful moments. I have experienced the lowests of lows and the highest of highs...and I would do it all again. Why?


Growth comes through pain. Emotional growth, spiritual growth, and sometimes Physical growth. Every time I was at my lowest, I came out the other side a better person....I learned I could make it. I learned I could rely on myself, I learned how to love myself, I learned how to love God.


During my younger days I was very destructive to my body and my soul. I chose to self medicate myself in many different ways. I was on a self destructive path. I cringe inside when I think of those days....but, I wouldn't change them. I managed to come out the other side...in cleaning up my body, I cleaned up my soul as well. I am able to empathise with people who are struggling, fighting the demons I fought. I found a relationship with myself that I never thought was possible. I learned how to love myself for who I am. I have a self confidence I never thought I would have.


Our struggle with infertility and our quest to adopt our children was a very difficult time in our marriage. There were times when our marriage was teetering on the edge. I am glad we had these struggles. Our marriage is solid now. Our struggles brought us closer. We share a bond that was made stronger through our struggles. My husband is my best friend. We can talk for hours and he still makes me laugh. Would we be this close if our road was straight? Did all the curves bring us closer? I don't know....what I do know is that we have never taken our children for granted. We wanted to be parents, we chose to become parents, we sought out our children and in that quest our marriage solidified.


I have a dear friend who is losing her battle with cancer right now. She is an amazing woman, a truly special soul. I feel honored to call her friend and have her in my life. She has taught me so much. Her strength and her positive outlook on life amazes me. She knows her battle is coming to an end and she is still living her life to the fullest, enjoying the company of her family and friends. She told me a few months ago - "I am making memories'". She is making beautiful memories for everyone around her. Watching her fade and knowing I am going to lose her soon is heartrenching. Would I go back in time and not choose her for a friend knowing this? Absolutely not....I have gained so much in this friendship. Yes it is painful now, yes my heart is breaking....but, yes...I have gained. I am able to look at life and learn to live it to the fullest. I have learned to make memories with my children. I have learned to love and be loved by my friends. I have learned how to be a friend. I have also learned that my friend has been given a gift. She knows her end is near and she is able to say what she wants to say, do what she wants to do, leave no stone unturned. This is a gift, we don't always get this.


Enjoy your life. Don't regret your past. Experience it. Live it. Learn from it. Grow emotionally and spiritually. Don't leave any stone unturned. Tell your family you love them daily.


Live your life with no regrets.